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Tuesday, April 8th, 2008

Time:9:46 pm.
Amanda says:
oh maybe you could have helped my psycho ex flatmate
Amanda says:
she was totally bipolar
Amanda says:
i had to leave today because her mood swings were unbearable
HANA says:
haha really? yeah it can b pretty hard 2 deal with
HANA says:
what was she like?
Amanda says:
she would come in and be laughing and seem way too happy
Amanda says:
and the next minute she would be depressed and down and not talking
HANA says:
i was just working with older ppl with bipolar and it was scary
Amanda says:
she would talk way too much and i would say to her 'i can't get a word in!' and she would say 'but you arent listening to me' and then start crying
Amanda says:
and then forget the conversation even happened
HANA says:
sounds like she had it really bad
Amanda says:
she doesnt know she has it
HANA says:
she should prob be in a hospital
Amanda says:
and i think im going to get personally attacked if i tell her
HANA says:
yeah she would be in denial and be really upset probably
Amanda says:
i know that isn't funny...(that she should be in hospital) but i just laughed
HANA says:
Amanda says:
i was staying in her flat cos i was meant to take over the lease on thursday when she went back to london
Amanda says:
but she didnt tell me that her and her flatmates werent paying the council tax or gas/elec
Amanda says:
so she was trying to get me to sign a lease on a place that was in the red
HANA says:
wow sounds like a good friend
HANA says:
wot a bitch
Amanda says:
yeah and i just packed up and left while she was at work
Amanda says:
and left a note
HANA says:
when was this?
Amanda says:
and she sent a text saying she cant believe i did that to her
Amanda says:
HANA says:
haha well what does she expect if shes trying to land u in debt n things
Amanda says:
i know
Amanda says:
and she crashed her car when she went back home to australia
Amanda says:
and has no money apparently
Amanda says:
yet today she claims her bank account was hacked or something
Amanda says:
does she have money or not? she told me she had 17 quid
HANA says:
compulsive lying is a symptom of bipolar lol. she sounds like a nightmare
Amanda says:
she did my head in
Amanda says:
spending 5 mins with her was like spending the whole day with her
Amanda says:
and i couldnt carry my food as i escaped so i had to re-buy all the groceries i just bought yesterday
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Saturday, February 23rd, 2008

Subject:R.I.P Rastus
Time:4:22 pm.
Rastus, my beautiful Ragdoll feline, passed away on Thursday the 21st of February 2008, just 8 days before I was due to arrive back in Perth to see him.

2 years ago he was diagnosed with a tumor in his lung. In the past 2 years since his diagnosis he continued to eat, play and behave as normally as any cat would. He was not in any recognisable pain apart from the occasional shortness or breath, easpecially in the hot weather.

He suddenly stopped breathing on Thursday, without warning, and then he was gone.

I want him to know that I will always miss him and that he will always have a special place in my heart.

I will love you forever and you will always be my baby.
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Monday, October 15th, 2007

Time:9:13 pm.
Hey kids it's been a while!

Stuff is going really well at the moment, apart from me being sick with a stupid cold. If I'm not trying to cough up my lungs I'm trying to set the world record for most slime to run out of one's nose in one sitting. I wish I had a tissue with me right now.

At the moment I'm just working and saving money for adventures to come! Although I do have some shows coming up - Within Temptation in Nov, Spice Girls in Dec and Jan and Nightwish in March. I actually prefer the new Nighwish singer to the old one. Is that wrong? I like being able to actually decipher what a singer is singing, plus it doesn't hurt my ears as much.

Cough cough cough cough cough.

I've been talking about my future with people that I've only known for a month and asking them what they think I should do career wise. I've been told I'd make a good Travel Agent or a Police Officer! Both of these things are things that I've considered doing in the past. I'm basically just flatlining at the moment though. Why is it so easy for some people? Probably one of my biggest fears is working a job that I hate and never ever finding the place where I belong. Maybe I should ask an online quiz. I've got so many ideas but very few seem actually workable.

Going home is so far off the radar that the idea of 'going home' may as well be a non existant idea.

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Friday, September 7th, 2007

Time:10:55 am.
It's been a while!

At the moment my mum is in London and we've been catching up and doing touristy things. So far we've been on the London Eye, been to Oxford and Stratford and seen Sound of Music at the theatre. Yesterday we went on a Jack the Ripper tour which was quite interesting. Tonight is the Lion King which should be pretty good as we have the most expensive seats! Ugh.

I like her being here because it means I get to do interesting things with her and she pays for it, but at the same time its brought up things that I'd rather not have to deal with. She's always talking about me coming home and the future which makes me think perhaps it was a bad idea for me to suggest that she comes over for my 21st. I guess she will be gone soon enough though and I will go back to feeling homesick for no particular reason other than the fact that I can.

I've finished up at Oakley Hotel and am now re-evaluating everything. I have a number of options. At this point I will be starting work at Dean Court on the 21st of September when I get back from my holiday. Perhaps I will survive another few months there which will give me the chance to save up some more dosh. The thing about Oakley is that it was always so dead there so the majority of the time I was just sitting there absorbed in myself and my own thoughts and over analysing everything and then over analysing everything I had already over analysed. For someone like me, or for anyone, this is never a good thing and has caused significant damage to my mental wellbeing and has caused me to start travelling down a path that will ultimately lead me to my destruction.

I'm trying to get out of my thoughts and over myself so that I can continue to live some kind of normal existance. I have no doubt that I'm going through some kind of period of psychosis. I keep having fucked up dreams and bouts of depressing and having nobody that really understands or that really cares only makes the situation worse. I am trying to surround myself with positive people as I think this may help me to get my head together but at the same time it just makes me more critical of myself.

I had a 2 really fucked up dreams last night. Firstly I dreamed that all the people around me were dying. They were faceless people and their deaths were disturbing beyond comprehension. Then I dreamed that I was shot in the stomach and the weird thing is that I physically felt the pain of being shot. I died, and the one thing I was worried about was the fact that I had not done enough good in my life and I'd just fucked with people for fun and had no real satisfaction out of anything in my short time on earth.
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Thursday, August 2nd, 2007

Subject:My life is so SPICED UP!
Time:2:34 pm.
Don't ask me how I did it, but I managed to get my hands on a ticket to the Spice Girls playing at 02 Arena, London on December 15th! I am so over the moon that last night I literally jumped over the moon and can now confirm that tiny aliens made out of cheese (most likely cheddar but possibly camembert) live on the surface of the moon in small huts. Some might consider the amount of money I paid for it a small fortune but YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE. I think the fact that I am going should prove to people that I actually do like the Spice Girls and I'm not just attention seeking.

At the end of the month my mum and my grandmother are coming to London and we're gonna hang out and see some sights before heading to Paris and then Somerset to see some rellies. While I'm in Somerset I'm gonna check out the area and if I like it I'm gonna consider moving there for the first 6 months of next year. I wanna shake things up a bit.

Yesterday I had a brialliant idea and pushed the two single beds together in my room and made myself a comfy double bed. Now I have a decent place to shag all my boyfriends and shoot myself up. HAHAHA.

Next week I'm going to Silverchair and then I'm going to Within Temptation in November and then Spice Girls in December. I need something to go to in October as that month is looking a little lonely. So far I've been to Melanie C and Type O in June and Metallica in July. So I've had something good every month.

I'm doing pretty good in London at the moment. I'm making some decent money and able to save a fair amount each week, though it is true what they say 'THE MORE YOU EARN THE MORE YOU SPEND!!!' as a couple of times now I've had some weekend benders where I've spent more than some people earn in a week on alcohol. I'm not even gonna add up the cost of all the concert tickets I've bought/will buy in the future as I'm seeing some fuckin good music lately.

MY job is so cruisy. Yesterday I answered the phone once, answered the door once, created my double bed, watched some TV and played some Nintendo DS. And I got PAID good money to do that. Never had a job so slack yet so well paying in my entire life. Fuck answering a call every minute and trying to sell shit to people and earning PEANUTS. Everyone should manage a hotel when u can just lie in bed all day or sit outside in the sunshine waiting for something to happen.

The only thing in life that I have to stress about at the moment is all the organising I'm going to be doing over the next few months...sorting out visas for the US and Canada, getting police checks, references, flights etc. I know I'm not going until next May/June but it's not like I can do these things the night before!!!

I feel a bit home sick at times but it's often just in passing, like I will think of certain things about back home that I didn't appreciate enough...like being able to walk down a street without getting run over by people or having people block your way or stop in front of you randomly or walk REALLY REALLY SLOWLY UGH. I'm pretty sure my walking speed had doubled or probably tripled since I've been in London. IT'S THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN GET ANYWHERE!!!
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Friday, June 29th, 2007

Subject:My biggest annoyance
Time:3:24 pm.
At times I have felt like I have stood alone in regards to my love for the Spice Girls.

I have been ridiculed and laughed at and looked down on.

The number of people who have shaken their heads at me in disgust/pity/amusement has been endless.

But now that a reunion has been announced, all of a sudden 65 million people come out of hiding and confess their undying love for the Spice Girls.

These were the people who were too cool to admit their true feelings and feared losing face in front of their peers.

Now it has become cool again to like the Spice Girls and on December 15 I will be surrounded by 25,000 COWARDS. Fake fans who have been too afraid to stand up for what they believe in. Perhaps I won't even get a ticket because of these 25,000 fake fans getting in first.

As probably one of their very few true and 100% legitimate fans I feel that above anyone else I deserve a ticket and that I above anyone else deserve a V.I.P backstage pass and unlimited spice girls chupa chups and other assorted merchandise!
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Friday, June 15th, 2007

Time:4:25 pm.
Seems its been a month since I last updated!

Good news is I'm still alive! The BEST news is that I'm having an absolute blast in London. Now that the job thing has happened for me, everything else has come together nicely. I work quite long hours but I get brilliant pay and free rent so I'm really just cruising along at the moment and saving a substantial amount of money. I've been about to do/see things in the afternoons every second day as well. 2 days ago I went to tate modern and saw some of Andy Warhol's stuff. Never thought I'd be privileged enough to see some of his originals so was stoked about that. Also saw some amazing work from other artists. Also saw some boring stuff, for example a painting that was just a grey canvass.

Went to Mel C last week and she was fantastic, no jokes. I guarantee you that anyone who went to that show whether they are fans or not had an absolutely awesome time.

I'm headed to Type O Negative next week and I really need to have a better listen to their new CD since all that's been on is Mel C and Within Temptation!

I'm gonna get pissed as a mule tonight and vomit in the full english breakfasts that I have to make tomorrow!
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Friday, May 18th, 2007

Time:12:00 pm.
Today I quit my job.

It did not feel right. I thought it would be ok, that it would get better, that I would get used to it. But there are only so many times that one can think that.

I've got something else lined up that should be pretty good.

I don't think I belong in an office. It's bullshit. I decided I'm going to be a cat breeder when I get home. What am I passionate about? Cats, live music (depending on the band) and my unwritten novel about 20 million different things that don't link together or make sense.

I can't work in an office. I couldn't work there. I'm a free spirit, I should know this shit. An office would kill me.

See, I'm learning more about myself.


This is what London is doing to me.

I've been here almost two months.

I did meet some truly awesome people working at Interlet. For that I believe it was meant to be. But nobody is happy in that office. 3 out of 5 of the people I had become friends with are leaving in the next two weeks. I'm getting 2 days pay. Hooray?

Yeah, I can't be in an office. Office work? Screw that. I can't work in retail either. Been there, done that, no thanks. Yeah, cats it is.
But until then, yes I have something but I'm not going to go saying what it is until I've definitely got the job.
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Tuesday, May 15th, 2007

Subject:She's a workin class gal
Time:8:30 pm.
Second official day of work today and I am well and truly BUGGERED! I don't think the word buggered itself can truly describe the degree to which I am tired.

The place I work can be a scary place. My boss is INSANE and has numerous screws loose. I don't like the way that certain things are done and if I was the boss I would change them because they are ineffective. In fact, I might suggest some improvements when I've been there for a couple of months.

I'm starting to learn the ins and outs of the business and I answer about 20-40 calls an hour. Tomorrow we have some advertising that's getting put out so the phones are basically going to be ringing off the hook all day. The good thing about that is the day goes quickly but the bad thing is the repetitiveness of what I have to tell them because they are basically all asking me the same thing and I am telling them the same thing. It's suprising how many actual British people call up so I'm meeting more British people on the phone than I've met in person while I've been in London.

I've had hilarious conversations with people from places like Sweden and Switzerland. My longest conversation with one person has been 15 minutes because I know hardly anything about anything I have to keep putting them on hold to find out.

After Wed I get to start signing people up which will be a little bit scary as we have to sell our service to them in a specific way. However at least I know that I will take good care of my clients!!! I work with a girl who just does not give a crap and her clients hate her!
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Tuesday, May 8th, 2007

Subject:I got a job.
Time:10:19 am.
Today I got a job.

2 days of unpaid training starting tomorrow and then I get to start making money!

I thought I was applying for an office admin job but turns out I was applying for a property consultant job. I was a little bit pissed off after the interview cos the lady told me I needed to be better groomed i.e get a haircut and some better clothes but apart from that it went quite well. It's walking distance from where I'm living which is a big bonus since I won't have to pay for the terribly expensive transport. Also the money is pretty good as well and I should be able to save a fair amount. Also the hours are good so I get to sleep in. I'll have a one year contract and when that ends it will be time for me to go to the US of A!

I was a little bit shat off because I started getting phone calls from my agencies right after I'd taken the job, but it would just mean more interviews and I need to get stuck into something. However I had a really funny conversation with the lady from one of my agencies because I was standing in the middle of a busy tube station when she called and wasn't really in a position to take a phone call so I was trying to sort my head out so I could speak to her coherently and it wasn't really working and she was laughing at me.

*Spoilers for Spidey 3 ahead*
Yesterday I saw Spiderman 3. During the scene where Peter hits Mary Jane some guy to the left of me yelled out 'thats rape!' and then some girl to the right of me yelled out 'HA HA!' and then the whole cinema started laughing during what was supposed to be a dramatic scene. I could not stop laughing and was laughing so hard I started to cry which made my Italian friend Andrea start laughing.
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Friday, May 4th, 2007

Time:12:45 pm.
I think I have almost recovered from last weekend (but now it's almost this weekend - ouch!). I feel like beer.

I met a boy. =)

I have a job interview on Tuesday. Office position at a real estate agency. Pray for me that I get it. Next I will be walking the street with my CV.

Agencies were pretty much a dead loss. And I decided I don't want a career in London anymore because that defeats the purpose of why I'm here which is to have fun. It's going to get in the way of my other travel plans. I'm glad I figured that out.

Things are happening! Give me some good vibes ppl!
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Friday, April 27th, 2007

Time:2:05 pm.
I'm pretty confident that I'm going to get the job I want in advertising sales. I'm expecting a call on Tuesday which will hopefully lead to some interviews. My CV has already been sent to Haymarket, which is on of the biggest publishing companies in Europe. Although, the lady at the recruitment agency I went to yesterday said she thinks I would be better suited to a smaller publishing company, because the big ones have psycho interviews and she thinks I would do better at one on one interview. She seemed quite impressed with me at some stages yesterday and was quick to point out some of my weaknesses which I can definitely work on. I'm excited but worried. Can't help but think 'what if it doesn't work out'. I just need to pass these interview stages and really sell myself and convince them that I can do the job and do it well.
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Friday, April 20th, 2007

Time:2:29 am.
today i bought tickets to: silverchair, metallica and type o negative.

i was trying to decide between velvet revolver and metallica but ended up picking metallica because it's at wembley stadium and i really wanna go to that venue just to see what it's like.

i almost decided that i would go to velvet revolver as well anyway, but that was another £40 which is another $100 pretty much.

total i spent today on 3 tickets = £100

june, july and august. 3 months in a row!

my brother already bought me 2 tickets to silverchair but i don't trust the ticketing company he bought them through even though it was the one linked from silverchairs official website. when/if they arrive i will just sell them to some people i'm staying with.

i'm excited!
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Thursday, April 19th, 2007

Time:9:57 am.
I went for the interview with the recruitment agency yesterday. It went really well. We had to do a debate and the topic was Kate Moss. One team had to argue that Pete Doherty was a bad influence on her image and she should get rid of him and the other team had to argue that it's her life and she can do what she wants. It was quite interesting. The only shit thing was there was this guy on my team who was so dominating he wouldn't let anyone get a word in. His arguments were so long winded and he kept repeating the same point over and over in different ways. The girl picked up on this and he got a bit of a grilling for it which was cool. People like that really piss me off. It's a new pet peeve of mine.

Pretty much I just have to decided who I want to work for. Some of the choices are Daily Mirror and Haymarket Publications. There's one company with a music magazine that I think I might go for. I just have to do a little bit of research (which I'm going to do right now) then call back my agency. They hook up the interview and also do a mock interview with you before you go.

I'm glad to be using my degree for something. This recruitment agency is a graduate agency so they only deal with people who have just graduated from uni. It's better than going for a job where they just pull anyone off the street (like the last one). I'm really excited!!!

If I'm really good at my job, in 10 years time I could be a publisher! Lol.
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Wednesday, April 18th, 2007

Time:6:32 pm.
Last night I randomly went to a pub to see some random bands and met these 2 scottish girls. One of them was a tennis coach. I was naming famous tennis players. I almost said Dana Fairbanks.
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Tuesday, April 17th, 2007

Time:12:36 pm.
This morning I was just hanging around doing nothing when I got a call from an events company who are looking for a website editor. I went in for an interview on very short notice, and found the place 15 minutes early. The interview went well, but there's a fair amount of competition so I'm not certain that I will get the job. Plus the job is only part time so I wouldn't be making enough money to survive, it would have to be supplemented by another job which opens up a whole new can of worms. However, it could be a gateway into other bigger, better things.

Still have my interview tomorrow with Clement Media, which is a recruitment company for jobs in the media. I'm feeling pretty positive about that and I reckon I will do really well and get a placement. I think by next week I will have secured a job.

I have no plans for this afternoon, I might head back 'home' and get changed and go to the museums across the park from where I'm staying.

I hope everyone is well.
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Saturday, April 14th, 2007

Time:4:54 pm.
Another job opportunity has come up and it's made me realise I do not want the other job working for http://www.talktalk.co.uk/ I'm going to tell them 'thanks but no thanks' =) It's a shame in a way because I really did like the people I was going to be working with. I would have liked to get to know them better but now I'm a deserter. =)

I bought a bottle of Jack Daniels last night.

Since being in London I've had 2 guys attempt to pick me up and they both weren't really my cup of tea.
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Friday, April 13th, 2007

Time:3:14 pm.
I am sick. I wish I was in bed right now, but I've just been to my second interview at Korco Marketing. Rocked up at 9:40 when my interview was 9:30 and nobody even noticed. Met up with two other people and we went to West Brom to a supermarket and they set their crap up and I got to watch them do their thing. My mentor is apparently a prodigy and sells a hell of a lot. Anyway I went back and Caroline had recommended me to the interviewer before he even interviewed me. He asked me a few random questions including 'what do the customers do if they don't save any money' and I stupidly answered 'get pissed off'. Lol. The answer was they get £1000, which is legit. The person who runs the company I'm sort of working for makes £7000 a week which is pretty decent and that's basically what everyone working for the company now is planning on doing. Anyway my training starts monday and then I get a 6 day trial to see if I can sell anything. Ideally they want me to make 3-4 sales a day. If I did that for 6 days I'd rake in £360 a week. Once I reach my sales target I get to go home (if the rest of the team has hit their target too). We all help each other out when we're trying to make a sale. The office is a really friendly environment and is just full of young people being sent to random places in London to sell stuff. I think it's going to be a pretty cruisy job. Statistics say that out of 100 people 90 ignore you or say no and 10 stop and give you a try. Wish me luck in selling stuff. I am so sleepy.
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Thursday, April 12th, 2007

Time:12:38 pm.
I am coming down with something. It's that feeling that you get when you start to feel that something isn't quite right in your chest/throat/head. So I bought some strepsils but they did nothing, then I went to the chemist again and he suggested some soluble aspirin. So let's hope that shit works cos I don't wanna have to visit the docter. It was cheap as chips, 69p.

I went for a job interview today for a sales and marketing company called Korco (part of the Cobra group). They basically just pull anyone off the street and turn them into sales people. There is no base salary which means that if the team of people I'm placed with don't make any sales then we don't get any money. It's also 6 days a week 8:30-6 so it's a real flogging of a job but I reckon I wanna give it a go. The interviewer said the average earning is £250-£400 pw, which when converted to aussie dollars is around $600-900ish pw. Plus I won't have to pay tax. The deal is that we set up events in store and then try to sell people stuff they don't want, mainly insurance and mobile phones. I reckon I'll get a call back cos everyone else in the room was like 'meh no base salary' but any salary is better than nothing imo. And it's true that if sales people had a base salary they would have no motivation to sell! Plus the interviewer was totally partial to me cos I'm Australian.

So I think I need to do a little more sightseeing before I start working my arse into the ground. Might start with the Tower of London cos I haven't seen that yet. This weekend I'm meant to go to the Walkabout with some randoms I met last week but I reckon if I'm gonna be feeling like shite I'm just gonna have to take it easy.
I totally shunned that Indian guy that asked me out and he's totally shunned me in return. Oh well! Not sure what I shall do for the rest of the afternoon. Maybe look in one of those touristy books and come up with something.

I'm all dressed up in a suit and I look really swanky. It cost me £40 for a jacket and shirt cos I panicked at like 7:30pm last night realising I had nothing to wear. Then they didn't have the matching pants in my size. So I was planning on going to a different store this morning but I got home and realised that the pants I bought with me are almost a perfect match to the jacket. What luck!!! Pot luck!!!

I'm going to sell mobile phones, become a millionaire and buy London.
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Friday, April 6th, 2007

Time:3:25 am.
Today I opened my UK bank account.

Then I applied for a few more jobs. I'm starting to just apply for anything (that interests me) that I think I might have a chance to get, as long as it pays more than the minimum wage which is £5.25 (roughly $13 AUD). They reckon in London because the cost of living is so high there is a minimum wage which is actually £7 or £7.50 but it's not law. Organisations can decide whether they will pay that or not. I'd consider giong for £6 or £6.50 if I get really desperate cos something is better than nothing. But nothing under £6 no way.

After that I went to Oxford Circus (i.e Oxford Street one of the biggest streets for shopping) cos I was gonna have a browse and see if I could find some clothes (I brought hardly anything with me and will end up spending so much on laundry that I might as well have bought new clothes). When I got off at the station the place was a complete madhouse. There was no room to walk along the street. So I bought a pie cos I was CRAVING some form of red meat. Then I had some Dr Pepper and decided to leave and try again on Sunday early in the morning like I was told to do by my room mate who I usually ignore cos she's a psycho who hits snooze about 15 times before getting out of bed.

After this I'm going to go read my free newspapers and then go to bed. It's only 8pm but London really takes it out of you. This place is so busy and overcrowded and psycho it's insane. And people don't care if they walk into you. I still like it though.
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